- Wow. Time does fly! Its Quick Quotation Day today, people!
So today’s special is a poem a friend e-mailed me. I find it creative and witty and something I know I’ll never be able to do so well. Unfortunately, the name of the poet is unknown.
This poem is quite famous, so if you’ve come across this and know who the poet is, please let us know in the comments section below. Thanks!
The famous speaker who no one had heard of, said,
Ladies and jelly-spoons, hobos and tramps,
Cross-eyed mosquitoes and bow-legged ants,
I stand before you to sit behind you
To tell you something I know nothing about.
Next Thursday, which is Good Friday,
There’s a Mother’s Day meeting for fathers only;
Wear your best clothes if you haven’t any.
Please come if you can’t; if you can, stay at home.
Admission is free, pay at the door;
Pull up a chair and sit on the floor.
It makes no difference where you sit,
The man in the gallery’s sure to spit.
The show is over, but before you go,
Let me tell you a story I don’t really know.
One bright day, in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
The blind man went to see fair play;
The mute man went to shout “hooray”
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came and killed the two dead boys.
A paralyzed donkey passing by
Kicked the blind man in the eye;
Knocked him through a nine-inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.
If you don’t believe this lie is true,
Ask the blind man; he saw it too,
Through a knothole in a wooden brick wall.